CSS by =Tooku-Mori

At the lack of sounding like an emo piece of shit I'm going to make this brief.

Over the past month I have never felt the genuine need to just beg for death to this extreme. I mean, we all have our moments where we just feel like dropping dead. I've had a lot of them. But this is getting to be too much. I always told myself "Well, good thing I'm not gutsy enough to kill myself, or it would have happened by now." and each day passes I feel braver. I'm just tired of fighting and putting up this brave face when I've seriously lost everything that's ever meant A LOT to me. Any person, or anything I've ever really, REALLY loved I've lost-- or I'm losing. And no fighting can bring that back, or change anything, and I'm too stubborn to realize it. I'm too stupid. Everything in me that wants to remain positive and wants to keep pointlessly fighting which just makes the pain worse and I honestly cant take it anymore. If you knew me personally you wouldn't read this as bullshit whining. Even my close friends might brush it off their shoulders as not being as bad as I make it sound because they don't know the half of what I go through, or deal with, or anything. But that's fine. I feel like I have a freedom to bitch and whine in my DA journal because no one really reads it. My friends don't get on here anymore, and I honestly could care less about the opinion of a stranger-- who shouldn't be reading my journals like these to begin with anyway. Seriously, you should have better things to do.

So even though all that just destroyed the point of me trying not to sound like an emo piece of shit, I WILL refrain from going into any kind of details. It's none of the world's business and it'll just make me sound worse. I hate feeling like someone who's crying for attention, but then again anyone who knows me knows I'm not like that.


Ranting briefly has helped me feel a bit better.


But yeah, so that's why I haven't been around much, to anyone who actually noticed or cared. I'm not too social on here, I just kind of do stuff...so I dont think it phased anyone. But just in case anyone was curious I'm just going through a really horrible time right now.


I dont know what inspired me to get on today, but just being on is making me feel a little better, too.


So anyway. Bestbuy sucks.

Darkside Chronicles coming out today was going to be the best thing ever.
I was so happy.
For the first time in a month, I felt somewhat happy.
Because this game
that I had been excited for and waiting for over a YEAR for came out today.

And I preordered it at Best Buy to make sure I would get my copy today.

And I was having a horrible day today too-- SO BAD that I couldnt even really FEEL happy over this game, it was the only thing keeping me sane today, I swear.

Then when I get to best buy I started to feel a smile.

AND THEN

THEN

AFTER HOURS OF SEARCHING FOR THE GAME THAT WAS MYSTERIOUSLY NOT ON THE SHELF

THEY TELL ME

THAT ONLY TWO BEST BUYS IN THE FUCKING UNITED STATES GOT THOSE GAMES IN TODAY.

AND GAME STOP ONLY HAD IN PREORDERED ONES, I just HAD to preorder from BESTFAIL.

And then my friend calls me and is all

"WTFBBQ WALMART HAS IT!!!"

..................................

Walmart NEVER has any Resident Evil games.


And I couldnt go to Walmart and get it because BEST BUY ALREADY HAD MY MONEY.

FUY$&*#FGT#&G#%GHUIRJKFH#RJGHGF


I couldn't even just got to Walmart to caress it through the glass because I had no ride.


Oh and my birthday is Friday.

I get to go to court!!!!!!!!! YAAAYYY!!!!!!!!!!!